Ten Minute Fix: The Eyesore

In college I lived with six guys in an apartment. We had stained blue carpet, torn up linoleum, cinder block walls, red and green plaid couches, and our only artwork was a ThunderCats poster. I had a lot of fun in that apartment, but for a kid who chose interior design over woodshop in high school, it was a difficult living situation. What I started doing was coming home, looking at the living room and deciding what was the biggest eyesore that I could do something about. The first thing I noticed was that the window sill had become a place to put junk that we didn’t have any other place for. So, I cleaned it off and removed enough dust to cover New Jersey (No offense New Jersey. I don’t really want to cover you with dust). The next day I came home from class and decided, now that the window is clean, what is the biggest eyesore? Over the course of a couple of years, I ended up scrubbing 20 years worth of bacon grease off the walls, rearranging furniture, and even cleaning…underneath…the refrigerator (pictured below).


Before




After



Ten Minute Fix: The Eyesore

So, if your life were my college apartment, what would its biggest eyesore be? Would it be a smoking habit? An estranged relationship? Not owning any Seinfeld on DVD (I shudder at the thought)? Follow these steps to start cleaning up, and improving the aesthetic of your life.

 

1. Imagine you are stepping back to see a complete picture of your life as it is now.

2. Take a quick look at your entire life. Relationships, finance, health, spirituality, education, etc…

3. What sticks out as the biggest eyesore?

4. Create a plan of action to either remove the eyesore, or even better, replace it with something beautiful.

  

Focus your self-improvement energy on this aspect of your life until it’s fixed. Then repeat the steps to move on to the next biggest eyesore. Eventually, you’ll find the deep hidden grime that you’ve spent years ignoring.



If there are things you feel like you can’t change, don’t worry. Work on what you can change and things have a way of working themselves out. My roommates and I couldn’t buy new furniture or carpet, but eventually management replaced them all for us. By the time I left, I could be proud of the apartment. The ThunderCats poster was still up, but ThunderCats is awesome, so…yeah.



Lazy? More Like Efficient

While it may have been faster to drive to the other side of my apartment complex, doing so would have invited too much ridicule to make it worth it.

Plenty of Ideas, Not Enough Action

Jackie from Spanish Fork, UT asks...
I have a lot of goals and ideas of things i want to do--places to go, skills to acquire, etc--but I have a really hard time taking the steps to accomplish the goals.  How can I kickstart myself into action?

Let's say that creating your ideal life can be divided up into the following four steps:

1. Decide what you want.
2. Outline steps to get what you want.
3. Take the previously outlined steps.
4. Enjoy having what you wanted.

Since you already have a lot of goals, the first step isn't any problem for you. That's really good! You know what you want to accomplish! So, let's focus on getting you to steps 2 and 3 now.

First of all, you need a clear picture of what you want. You have a lot of ideas, but can you work on them at the same time? Are any more important to you than others? Do any conflict with each other? If one of your goals is to win the 70th Semi-annual Poughkeepsie Pie Eating Competition, and the other is to maintain a healthy weight, you may have to end up choosing one of the two, or at least do one first and then work on the other.

Now that your goals and ideas are spelled out and can all get along, you're ready to develop your plan of action in step 2. Your steps may look very different from another person's steps. Some people love planning every little detail and breaking their goals down to a billion mini-goals. Other people get lost in the details and prefer only a few smaller goals just to give them some momentum. Whatever your style, decide what has to happen in order for you to have what you want.

Step 3 gets to the heart of your question, but make sure you've done step 2 first. It's very hard to take steps towards your dream if you don't even know what direction to go in. The two greatest tools to help kickstart you into action are DEADLINES and ACCOUNTABILITY.

Deadlines
"Some day" needs to be stricken from your vocabulary. If you were to start working on your dream today, what would be your first step? Answer that question, and then do it. Set a deadline for your main goals and also for any mini goals you set in your plan of action.

Accountability
I've let myself down so many times in the past that it doesn't even phase me anymore. If you're anything like me, you need other people to know about your goals so they can encourage you and hold you accountable. Learn to welcome any reminders or advice they give you. Since you asked for their help, don't resent them for doing exactly what you asked of them.

Do whatever you can to keep the vision of what you want alive and strong. Think about it every day and work towards it every day. A great resource for you would be David Allen's book Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity. It's written more for the business world, but I've found his advice applies to any situation and helps turn what you want into what you have.

Pepperoni

While pepperoni is the most popular, its fans are not nearly as passionate or emphatic as pineapple lovers.

Realistic Goal Setting

Every couple of years I'll try a tomato to see if my taste has matured. I suspect no one really likes tomatoes and this is all some big conspiracy or experiment to see if the entire world can convince one man to eat something gross.

Ten Minute Fix: Refrigerator Evaluation

What does your refrigerator say about you? Are you a slob? Neat freak? Health nut? Bachelor? Spend ten minutes working on the following activity. It will help you listen to what your fridge desperately wants to tell you.
**NOTE** If you have the time, it’s okay if you spend more than ten minutes on this, but to be safe, don’t leave any food out longer than an hour.

1. Remove everything from your fridge and ask yourself these questions.
--Was it way too easy to empty your fridge, or did it put you over your ten minutes?
--Now that your fridge is empty, how does it look? Could it use a good cleaning?
--Did you find any “food” items that can’t be identified?




2. Put back everything you consider to be healthy (or at least not bad for you).
--Did anything make it back into your fridge?
--What are some healthy foods you enjoy that deserve some space in there?

3. Throw away anything expired or unsafe to eat.

4. Take a look at what’s left outside the fridge.
--Are there any vices staring back at you? Maybe a #10 can of chocolate pudding?
--Would you eat healthier if the cheese infused hotdogs weren’t around to tempt you?

5. Put everything that makes the cut back in the fridge.

6. Make goals based on what you saw.
--Nothing but soda, ketchup, and moldy take-out boxes in your fridge? Maybe you’re eating out too much and could save some money and calories making your own meal every once in a while.
--No fruits or vegetables? Perhaps a trip to the produce aisle is in order.
--Unidentified slime covering every surface? A monthly, or even yearly, cleaning might help.

Guest Blogger: Nathan Robbins

This post is by Nathan Robbins. I could stay up all night talking with him about his ideas. His use of personality typing to understand other people goes a long way toward improving relationships.

George Carlin once said, "Have you ever noticed that anyone who drives faster than you is a maniac, and anyone who drives slower than you is an idiot?" It's true, we tend to view any person who thinks or acts in a way other than we would as mean, air-headed, stubborn or just plain dumb. Interacting with people through this lens can lead to a great deal of frustration, heartache, and hurt feelings.

We naturally have the tendency to seek out people who think like we do, like the same things, and even say the same catch phrases. But no one does things exactly the same as us. That's a great thing, though, because I can't think of a more boring relationship! We are bound to run into conflicts, differences of opinion, and friends who think that your favorite sweater makes you look twenty years older, and don't seem to have any problem with telling you.

Everyone has a unique personality, a unique way of viewing the world. Your ability to understand it and take it into account when dealing with them can determine the strength of your relationship. I've listed below a variety of different types of personalities (based loosely off of Jungian Typology and Myers-Briggs Type Indicators). Try to apply these types to yourself and the people closest to you. How close to your personality are they? After you have a pretty good idea of who is what, the most important part is to realize that these differences are a GOOD thing. We need them. Desperately.

Attention Grabber

These people are impressive. They either have the funniest anecdotes, the greatest talents, or the most unique viewpoints that they are happy to share with you. You can either resent them for stealing the limelight whenever they get the chance, or you can just enjoy their creative energy and knack for finding so much joy in simply being alive.

Space Cadet

Often found lost in a book, a video game, or a new theory, they are known for being anywhere but in the present. They have a better sense of what they don't want than what they want, so often lack the motivation to pursue fixed goals. To some they can come off as lazy or procrastinators; others learn to run off with them in their fantasies and views of the way the world could be.

Go-Getter

These are the people who know what they want, and they know what they need to do to get it. They quickly take in loads of information and can make accurate decisions based off of it. It can be very frustrating to deal with them if you want to go a different direction than they do, but when you're on the same side, you can accomplish things you never thought possible.

All in Focus

This type has championed a cause and are most often found trying to tackle it alone, whether it be intellectual pursuits, or trying to solve all the problems of the world. They are even-tempered steady, and hard-working. Some people can easily become frustrated with their lack of spontaneity, but a wonderful balance can be struck by sticking to the old notion of work hard first so you can play hard later.

All of the above types are matched with one of the types below. Some pretty fascinating combinations result:

Eutopian

Eutopians want to make the world a better place. They try to see the best in everyone and everything, and can become extremely disappointed when they don't find it. It can be tiring to try to keep up with their optimism and wade through their low periods, but if you can stand the roller coaster, you can experience life in a way that few ever get to.

Intellect

Seekers of truth, the intellects try to find the meaning behind even the most trivial occurrences. They rarely take things at face value, and are often trying to "read between the lines" of everything you say. I admit, it can be easy to tune out of their philosophical rants, or be baffled by their social oddities, but they often hold the greatest insights and clearly interpret even the most subtle idiosyncrasies.

Realist

This type is based in reality. They spend their time in experiencing the world through things, whether they be the newest gadgets, classic cars, or sports. They can be adventurous or practical, but are most often logical. Their tendency to not take into account others' emotions can make them seem callous or rude, but they are the type to get to know when you want to experience what the world has to offer.

The Heart

These people want to experience human emotion. Some do it by taking care of you, some do it by creating art. They are primarily concerned with the human condition and spend their time seeking positivity. It is easy to become frustrated with their at times irrational and emotional behavior, but no one else can make you feel more cared for and loved.

Granted, everyone is a mixture of all of the types, but people tend to exhibit two of them predominately. As I said earlier, the better you understand where someone is coming from, the more you can understand their behavior and strengthen your relationship with them. Now, the next time you recount your awful day through tears, and your significant other says "you want to go out to eat?" you might just smile and realize that that is the way that THEY would want to take care of that problem. And you can explain to them that you don't do things exactly the same way they do. . .

How to Know if You're in Love or Not

Jason from Utah asks...
How can I know if I’m in love? I know I really like a girl, and I’m feeling like I should know if I love her or not, but I’m not sure.

With all the poems, songs, stories, books, movies, and legends about love, you may wonder if you're really in love if you haven't had to risk your life, or give up your rank in society, or humiliate yourself by singing in front of the entire senior class to win the object of your affection.

Love comes in many different shapes and forms. Two people may love each other when they’re first married, and they may love each other after being married 50 years, but are their feelings for each other the same? I sure hope not. After 50 years of raising a family, overcoming struggles, and learning about each other, it seems like a joke that we use the same word to describe their feelings in both situations.

So, there are varying degrees of different kinds of love, but is there some threshold where a man will pass from “like” to “love”? There may be one, but unfortunately, it will be unique to each individual and I can’t draw a line where it’s love if you climb to the peak of a mountain to get her a rare flower that only blossoms one day every ten years, but it’s only “like” if you stop by Home Depot and buy her a fern.

I like feelings and all, but I also have an analytical mind, so I'll respond to your question somewhere between, "love is just a part of the reward center of the brain that lights up in an MRI when you are either addicted to a person, or cocaine" and "love is like sliding down an eternal rainbow of sunshine with all your friends and a basket of s'mores".

These questions will help you define what kind of love you're thinking of and then decide if you  are...ummm....in it? or not.

What will be the result of being in love?

If you’re in love, does that mean getting married, not breaking up, buying a dog together, or just saying “I love you” before you hang up the phone?

What are the feelings that would warrant the results?

Do you currently have those feelings?

If the answer is yes, you’re in love. If the answer is no, you can take steps to develop those feelings, or make your definition of love a little less strict.

Example 1

Mike's girlfriend has just dropped the "L Bomb" and he wants to be able to reciprocate, but isn't sure if what he feels is love.

What are the results?

If he is in love, he will tell his girlfriend that he loves her and their relationship will become stronger and most likely more committed.

What feelings would warrant the results?

Mike believes that to enter into more commitment with this girl he should enjoy being with her, want to make her happy, be attracted to her, be able to confide in her, and feel like they could potentially have a happy future together.

Are the feelings there?

Yes. He's in love.

Example 2

Six months later, jewelry stores are starting to catch Mike's eye. He's thinking about buying a ring and popping the question. He knows he loves her, but he really wants to know if he is IN LOVE with her.

What are the results?

Marriage. Commitment. Till death do them part. Sickness and Health. Taking care of her financially and emotionally.

What feelings would warrant the results?

Mike thinks that to make that kind of commitment, he needs to want nothing more than to protect her and be kind to her and he must anticipate enjoying spending the rest of his life with her. He shouldn't be able to imagine his life without her.

Are the feelings there?

Yes. He's in love.

Don't assume everyone has the same definition of love. If you decide you are in love, and you let her know, don't just say you love her. Tell her what loving her means to you. 

Cholesterol

If getting dumped made me eat oatmeal and wheat bread, college would have added 15 years to my life...

Guest Blogger: Ashley Simmons

This post is by Ashley Simmons. Check out her blog Cake Optimist for more delicious/optimistic adventures in baking.

This weekend we decided to go to this wonderful little bakery called THE CHOCOLATE. 
It is in Orem, Utah and is in a cute old house. Almost every room is decorated
and you can just go explore and find a place to sit. The cake is to die for, especially the one
that is yellow cake with chocolate ganache, lovingly called "The Husband." They also have a very
good red velvet cake and it inspired to me to try to make my own. A friend was craving it, I was
needing to bake, and I got some really cute Valentine’s Day sprinkles so this is what happened...

If you have read my blog before you know this, but I like to include the recipes I use and share
the love of baking! For this cake I used a recipe from allrecipes.com that turned out really good.
I used a cup of sour cream instead of a cup of buttermilk. The batter turned out really thick, but
it baked nicely.

Ingredients
1/2 cup shortening
1 1/2 cups white sugar
2 eggs
2 tablespoons cocoa
4 tablespoons red food coloring
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup buttermilk (or sourcream)

2 1/2 cups sifted all-purpose flour
1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
1 tablespoon distilled white vinegar

Directions
Grease two 9 inch round pans. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
Cream shortening and 1 1/2 cups sugar WELL. Add eggs and beat well.
Make a paste of cocoa and red food coloring. Add to creamed mixture. Mix salt, 1 teaspoon
vanilla and buttermilk together. Add alternately the flour with the milk mixture to the creamed
mixture. Mix soda and vinegar and FOLD INTO CAKE BATTER. DON'T BEAT OR STIR NOW.
Bake for 30 minutes.

When I baked this, I opened the oven at exactly the wrong time, which is why it sort of fell in
the center, but it was not too much of a problem. I baked these in two 6” pans, which made a
smaller, but taller cake. It just gives a little bit of a different look than 9” pans do.

After the cake cooled, I cut each one in half long ways and stacked and filled them with a cream
cheese icing.

Cream Cheese Icing

Ingredients

2 cubes, (or 1 cup) butter
1 8oz package of cream cheese
5 cups powdered sugar
2 – 3 tablespoons milk or cream
1 tsp vanilla

Directions
Cream together the butter and cream cheese. Mix in the powdered sugar a little at a time and
then add the milk or cream and vanilla. You can add more sugar or more milk depending on
how thick you want it.
Mix this on high speed for about 7 minutes. This is an important part of the frosting process as
it will make the frosting fluffy and light. It will also make it whiter, which just looks nice.

I love this frosting recipe. It still has the richness of cream cheese icing, but it also has the fluffy-
ness of buttercream so enjoy that!

This cake was small enough that I just spooned the buttercream in between the layers and
spread it around. I then put on a layer of icing to act as a dirty ice. This catches all the crumbs
and keeps the final icing super smooth.

Freeze this, with the crumb coat, for about 15 minutes and then you can add the final layer
of icing. There are a plethora of youtube videos that talk about frosting a cake smoothly with
buttercream. Watch it, love it.

Finally, I just added some of my heart sprinkles. I got them in a cute little Valentine’s day
packaged my mom sent me. What can I say, she just gets me. I think it turned out pretty cute
and it was easy. We cut her open and it just looks so beautiful to see that bright red cake and
the stark white frosting. I also had some left over batter so I made a few cupcakes and decorated
them with the same sprinkles and icing.

I hope y’all love this cake as much as I do. Happy love week!

A Fine Line

That line is a drugged golden retriever, trespassing, and locks of your hair.

A Letter

Here's a letter that is very sad, yet very beautiful. Reading it makes me appreciate my wife and every day I have with her.

July the 14th, 1861

Washington DC

My very dear Sarah:

The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days - perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write you again, I feel impelled to write lines that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more.

Our movement may be one of a few days duration and full of pleasure - and it may be one of severe conflict and death to me. Not my will, but thine 0 God, be done. If it is necessary that I should fall on the battlefield for my country, I am ready. I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in, the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how strongly American Civilization now leans upon the triumph of the Government, and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and suffering of the Revolution. And I am willing - perfectly willing - to lay down all my joys in this life, to help maintain this Government, and to pay that debt.

But, my dear wife, when I know that with my own joys I lay down nearly all of yours, and replace them in this life with cares and sorrows - when, after having eaten for long years the bitter fruit of orphanage myself, I must offer it as their only sustenance to my dear little children - is it weak or dishonorable, while the banner of my purpose floats calmly and proudly in the breeze, that my unbounded love for you, my darling wife and children, should struggle in fierce, though useless, contest with my love of country?

I cannot describe to you my feelings on this calm summer night, when two thousand men are sleeping around me, many of them enjoying the last, perhaps, before that of death -- and I, suspicious that Death is creeping behind me with his fatal dart, am communing with God, my country, and thee.

I have sought most closely and diligently, and often in my breast, for a wrong motive in thus hazarding the happiness of those I loved and I could not find one. A pure love of my country and of the principles have often advocated before the people and "the name of honor that I love more than I fear death" have called upon me, and I have obeyed.

Sarah, my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me to you with mighty cables that nothing but Omnipotence could break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me irresistibly on with all these chains to the battlefield.

The memories of the blissful moments I have spent with you come creeping over me, and I feel most gratified to God and to you that I have enjoyed them so long. And hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when God willing, we might still have lived and loved together and seen our sons grow up to honorable manhood around us. I have, I know, but few and small claims upon Divine Providence, but something whispers to me - perhaps it is the wafted prayer of my little Edgar -- that I shall return to my loved ones unharmed. If I do not, my dear Sarah, never forget how much I love you, and when my last breath escapes me on the battlefield, it will whisper your name.

Forgive my many faults, and the many pains I have caused you. How thoughtless and foolish I have oftentimes been! How gladly would I wash out with my tears every little spot upon your happiness, and struggle with all the misfortune of this world, to shield you and my children from harm. But I cannot. I must watch you from the spirit land and hover near you, while you buffet the storms with your precious little freight, and wait with sad patience till we meet to part no more.

But, O Sarah! If the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you; in the garish day and in the darkest night -- amidst your happiest scenes and gloomiest hours - always, always; and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall be my breath; or the cool air fans your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by.

Sarah, do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again.

As for my little boys, they will grow as I have done, and never know a father's love and care. Little Willie is too young to remember me long, and my blue eyed Edgar will keep my frolics with him among the dimmest memories of his childhood. Sarah, I have unlimited confidence in your maternal care and your development of their characters. Tell my two mothers his and hers I call God's blessing upon them. O Sarah, I wait for you there! Come to me, and lead thither my children.

Sullivan

Sullivan Ballou was killed a week later at the first Battle of Bull Run, July 21, 1861.

Ten Minute Fix: Reignite an Old Flame

Happy Valentine's Day! It's Love Week here at the Vaughn Life Coaching Blog. We'll be having lovey dovey/lovey swan-y themed posts all week!












Here's the lineup

Monday - Ten Minute Fix

Tuesday - Something I Think is Neat

Wednesday - Guest Blogger: Ashley Simmons from "The Cake Optimist" blog

Thursday - Answer to one of your questions on love.

Friday - Guest Blogger: Nathan Robbins, discussing the use of personality typing to improve relationships.

This ten minute fix isn't about getting back together with your ex, but instead, getting back the excitement and butterflies you felt when you first started dating your spouse. Over the course of the years, the thrilling and spontaneous love two people feel when they are first getting to know each other evolves into a more comfortable and secure love. While this evolution is natural and good for us as we settle down, it's fun to remember the days when you didn't know that he only sneezes in pairs, or she only eats the tops of muffins.

1. Answer the following questions.
What was it that initially attracted you to your spouse?
What do you love about your spouse that you didn't know when you were dating?
How would you treat your spouse today if you were still trying to win them over?

2. Tell them the answers to the first two questions.

3. Show them the answer to third question.

It's not healthy to expect love to always be a raging fire, but stoking the flames every once in a while and then returning to your comfortable and cozy glowing embers is perfectly healthy, and a nice way to live.

Happy Valentine's Day again, and don't forget to check back every day this week!

Perfection

The Manipulation and Coercion section is past Travel and Local Interests, but if you see Cookbooks, you've gone too far.

The Awkward Roommate Meeting

Jerry from New York asks...

I've just moved into a new apartment with a friend. Is there anything I can do now to prevent future resentment building up about cleaning, public-space sharing, etc, without having an Awkward Roommate Meeting?  

Is it wrong that I assume this question is from Jerry Seinfeld himself?

Well, Jerry, potential problems in your situation will be due to expectations that are not being met. This means some type of communication will have to take place so that each of you knows what is expected of you. Don’t worry though. If we can identify exactly what would make such a conversation awkward, we can then remove the awkwardness with surgical precision.

Begin by looking over your rental agreement, if you have one, and make sure you are following everything outlined in it. If you are meeting the basics like paying rent on time and no loud music after 1 am you’ll be in a good position to discuss things like taking out the trash and cleaning common areas (kitchen, living room, bathroom, garage, ballroom, elevator, gymnasium, etc…)

To tackle your question, let’s go over the Awkwardness Potential (AwkPot) and possible solutions.

AwkPot: Strong feelings of contempt already exist before beginning the conversation. 

Solution: Talk about your expectations as ASAP as possible. If you’ve already been tracking mud through the house for three months, (because you were raised in a home with no carpet and your mom just sprayed down the floors twice a week) when you finally talk about it, your roommate just might explode. The road to conversational Hades will be paved with your good intentions.

AwkPot: Feeling like you’re either telling a friend what to do, or being told what to do.

Solution: At least in the beginning, only offer suggestions of what YOU might do to help make living together easier. Have some ideas before you start talking about it. Don’t ask, “What can I do?” That just makes it difficult for your roommate. Instead, let him know, that if he thinks of anything, he can talk to you about it. Hopefully your roommate will follow your lead and think of things he can do also. Once an environment of self-improvement is established, it will be less awkward to suggest ways each other could improve.

AwkPot: Having a scheduled “roommate meeting” is just inherently and unavoidably awkward.

Solution: Don’t have an official meeting. Just casually say something like, “Hey dude, being friends and roommates is pretty cool, so I’ve thought of some stuff I can do to make it stay cool.” Or you can say something like, “My dear comrade, I fear that due to our varying upbringings, we may have incongruent expectations that, if left uncorrected, could harm this lovely arrangement we presently enjoy. Let us join together in a friendly, yet frank, collaboration to preemptively resolve any and all future friction that could be reasonably foreseen.”

Even if there is a little bit of awkwardness, remember that in the hierarchy of emotions, a little bit of awkwardness is better than a lot of resentment.

Chinese New Year

This is only applicable for 2011 since the Chinese New Year takes place whenever it feels like it.

Common Misconception

It's not my fault that normal people with their tiny, beady little ears are so sensitive...

Ten Minute Fix: Loosen Up

The idea for this week’s ten minute fix comes from my sister-in-law and her friends.  Every once in a while they get together for a 30 minute dance party. I’d go into more detail, but I think the name explains it all. This ten minute adaptation of the thirty minute dance party is meant to loosen you up when you really need it.

1.       Turn on your Ten Minute Dance Party Music Mix (TMDPMM)

2.       Let loose and start dancing. Feel free to go crazy and have fun with it. You can do it alone, or with friends if they need some loosening up too. You can even dance like this if you want.

3.       Turn off the TMDPMM and catch your breath

Possible Applications

Nervous about giving a presentation?... Ten Minute Dance Party.

All tense before a big date?... Ten Minute Dance Party.

Bored?... Ten Minute Dance Party.

Pain in the lower right side of your abdomen?... Go to the doctor. Get some blood work done. Have your appendix removed. Recover. Ten Minute Dance Party.

Benefits of Dance

It can be a great cardiovascular workout. (Especially dancing to Bollywood music)

Improves strength and flexibility.

Helps you lose weight.

Increases self-confidence.

Reduces stress.

I tried to find a really good article in a reputable journal about dance and it's effect on stress, but searching online journals stressed me out. I should dance instead. I'm sure it would be safe to say that some study done by some Scandinavian research institute says that dance has been shown to reduce stress levels in lab rats.

Percentages

100 out of 0 statisticians agree that this makes perfect sense.

Working Out Isn't Working Out

Braxton from Texas asks...

"I have high blood pressure. I have been eating healthy the last 2 weeks and I have felt much better; however, it's the gym that I just don’t like. I just can’t seem to get motivated to go. I hate it, I guess. Do you have any suggestions for me to get over that and help me enjoy the gym?"

I know personally that a reward of barbecued brisket and chocolate ice cream after going to the gym would motivate ME, but that would be counterproductive. This may sound oversimplified, but the only way to enjoy the gym, is to get some kind of satisfaction from going. Regular exercise results in feeling healthier and happier, but unfortunately, it takes a lot of time and hard work before it can be recognized. Once you're in the habit of working out and you feel healthier and can see the effects, you will enjoy it. The trick is sticking with it until you get to that point. Here are some ideas you can try.

Remove the Option

In college, I went to all my classes...for a while. I had a pretty good record, but one day I missed a class. Much to my surprise, the world didn't end. I didn't even get behind or miss anything important. Suddenly, I felt like not going to class was an option. After that, going to class was a huge struggle. Every time I had to DECIDE to go, where before I just went because that's what I had to do. If you can commit yourself to the point where going to the gym is the only option, it will be easier. You won't have to think about how tired you are, or the other things you could be doing. You'll just think, "It's 7:00. Time to go to the gym." Simple.

Bribe Yourself

Since the rewards of good health will take a while to manifest themselves, you can create an artificial reward to tide you over. Maybe if you go to the gym three times a week for a month you can go on a little trip or buy that autographed picture of Jason Alexander you saw on eBay. For this to work, you have to really want whatever reward you choose, and be willing to deny yourself that reward if you don't meet the terms you have set.

Go with a Friend

If you go to the gym with someone else on a regular basis, they'll be able to encourage you and hold you accountable if you don’t show up. Find someone with a similar goal and schedule as you. It won’t be hard to find someone who made a New Year’s resolution to lose weight or get into shape. Strike up a deal where you will make sure they go, if they in turn make sure that you go.

The key is to discover what’s holding you back, and then find a way around it. (See Figure Below) Your obstacle and solution will be unique to you. Consider the ideas I mentioned above, but the solution you come up with for yourself will be the most powerful.

Venn Diagram of Metabolism